Shortz: Top Ten Movies (2023 Edition)

I've watched so many great movies since I first started this blog, I think it's about time for an updated Top Movies list, and this time we're going for ten, because five just isn't enough.

In no particular order, and with a full spoiler warning in effect:

The Northman

Do you like brutal Viking revenge tales? Would you like your brutal Viking revenge tale with a side of cultural deconstruction and not-so-subtle ruminations on honor, fate, and traditional masculinity? Then does Robert Eggers have a movie for you! Alexander Skarsgard stars as Amleth, our aforementioned Viking who is out for revenge on his uncle for killing his father and stealing away with his mother. Notice I didn't call Amleth our hero, because he isn't. The Northman is very clear about the fact that while Amleth's journey is epic, it's certainly not heroic. Our protagonist is driven to horrific acts of savagery in the name of familial honor, a notion instilled in him by the animalistic rituals of his father. Amleth's quest for revenge claims the lives of those he sought to destroy, causes him to abandon his love, and costs him his own life in turn, leaving you to wonder; was this destructive path truly the right one?

That doesn't stop the movie from being exciting as hell, however. Watching Amleth carve a bloody path that leads all the way to his treacherous uncle is certainly viscerally satisfying, as he violently removes the corrupt and often outright evil servants of his uncle's fiefdom one night at a time, freeing slaves and stopping human sacrifices. The dialogue and delivery is downright goosebumps inducing, the soundtrack is eerie and epic, and every actor is giving 100%. The movie is also friggin' gorgeous to boot, packed to the brim with breathtaking vistas and excellent camera work. This has been lodged in my brain since I first viewed it, and I recommend it highly, but know that this isn't a fast paced, frenetic action movie; it's an epic.

The Green Knight

Would ya look at that, another movie about men attempting to achieve greatness at any cost because of the culture in which they were raised. Maybe epic fantasy movies about toxic masculinity and generational trauma just tick a weirdly specific box for me, who knows. Either way, The Green Knight is an easy pick for my top ten, and one of the best films I watched last year by a mile.

Based on my favorite Arthurian legend, the tale of sir Gawain and the Green Knight (which I will admit to having read entirely on accident after hastily grabbing a book from my middle school library to write an essay about), David Lowery spins quite a rendition of the story. Choosing to engage in a game that will test his virtue as a knight, as well as his character as a human being, Gawain is forced to confront not just his greatest personal flaws along his journey, but also the slow decay of time and the inevitability of death. He is forced reflect on the way his knightly culture of honor and valor above all conflicts with morality and nature. A story told with excellent acting, arresting dialogue, beautiful visuals, and a gorgeous, haunting soundtrack, this movie is everything I could have asked for in a medieval epic.

Drive

Even after all of the great movies I've seen since 2011, this one is still near or at the top of my list, and not just because this was the first movie I watched where a car chase truly made me feel something. Driven (ha) by a steely, brooding Ryan Gosling (who conveys so much emotion with so little dialogue) and a tight, simple premise, this is the movie that started me on my journey to thinking of films more critically.

This film starts out decidedly slow (after it's pulse pounding opening), as we view the Driver in his everyday life as a stuntman moonlighting as a getaway driver in LA. Things quickly take a turn for the ultra violent, however, when he's tangled up in a mobsters scheme after trying to help the ex-con husband of his neighbor, a woman for whom he has developed feelings. A movie of few words, sudden violence, and brutal tension, this is my textbook example of noir done correctly, and I've only grown to appreciate more since I first saw it.

Star Wars/The Empire Strikes Back

I mean come on, these are the two best sci-fi movies ever created, you really think anything was going to remove them from my top ten? I know I've mentioned it before, but sci-fi owes more to Star Wars than I think most people realize; sci-fi before Star Wars was...rough. These are the movies that changed everything, and the fact that they're just plain great movies on top of being revolutionary is just gravy.

Knives Out

I refuse to pretend that this isn't one of the most fun movies I've ever watched. I've learned recently that some people who hate 'The Last Jedi' have essentially boycotted this movie (and now its sequel), because they hate Rian Johnson. This is stupid for a couple of reasons; 1) 'The Last Jedi' was awesome and 2) they're depriving themselves of easily the best whodunnit...ever.

Following the untimely death (ruled suicide) of the Thrombey family patriarch, an obscenely wealthy mystery novelist, his combative family vies for their share of his wealth and come head-to-head with surprise investigator Benoit Blanc (played with unrelenting charisma by Daniel Craig, who is clearly having a blast). Lead by one of the best ensemble casts ever assembled (Toni Colette, Ana De Armas, Daniel Craig, Jamie Lee Curtis, Michael Shannon, Chris Evans, Don Johnson), and bolstered by Rian Johnson's razer sharp dialogue, this movie is just wall to wall entertainment; whether it be the family making not-so-subtle snipes at each other behind closed doors, Daniel Craig's over the top persona, or the thrill of watching our main character attempt to outsmart a detective who always knows more than he's letting on, there's never a dull moment.

The Martian

I'm glad I rewatched this recently, it was good to remember that Matt Damon is a great actor after seeing him in that woeful Cryptocurrency commercial where they compared crypto to space flight and other major human achievements. Yeesh. Anyway.

Following the story of a NASA botanist stranded on Mars, this movie doesn't really require a deep analysis, it's just a lot of fun to watch. A story that, in the wrong hands, would have been drab and depressing, is instead full of hope and triumph in the face of impossible odds. Every actor, I mean everyone, brought their A-game to this movie, the visuals are masterful, and the story of a lone man using his scientific knowledge to survive on an alien planet manages to be nice and simple, but at the same time compelling as hell, and is made all the better by the idea of humanity working hand in hand to bring him home. Movies like this are what I would consider to be ideal blockbusters, it's a real crowd pleaser.

The Nice Guys

If you haven't already seen Shane Black's hilarious 70s buddy cop romp, what are you still waiting for?! This was easily the funniest movie of 2016.

Ryan Gosling and Russel Crowe are perfect as a couple of fumbling PI's out to find a troublesome lost porno film, who end up getting a lot more than they bargained for. Every scene is a riot, there wasn't a 5 minute period where I wasn't doubled over laughing at something that happened, and Black's signature dialogue is as sharp as ever. This one I won't dare spoil, as the surprises are best experienced fresh (Black is notorious for turning the expected on its head, and this movie is no exception), but seriously, if you haven't seen this yet, get on it.

The Grand Budapest Hotel

By far the most entertaining film that Wes Anderson has ever released, this was an easy pick for my top ten. His only other film that even comes close, in my opinion, is 'Fantastic Mr. Fox'.

We're shown the adventures of Zero, a lobby boy at the illustrious Grand Budapest hotel, who works directly with its eccentric and charming concierge (played to killer effect by Ralph Fiennes). What ensues is one of the goofiest, silliest, and most heartwarming films I've ever seen. The moving story, the ensemble cast that are more than game for whatever Anderson has in store, and exceptional dry humor paired with the best-in-class visuals make for an experience that is, for lack of a better word, lovely. It's a hard thing to describe, but this film feels downright cozy.

Nightcrawler

I don't even know where to begin with this film, it's quite an experience.

Jake Gyllenhaal plays Louis Bloom, a con man who ends up entering the scene of crime journalism in LA, going to great, morally bankrupt lengths to muscle his way to the top of the mountain. Louis is a sociopath through and through, and the way Gyllenhaal plays him will stick with you; an actor playing an actor, every conversation he has is full of phoniness and smarm, making it all the more impactful when the mask comes off and his true intentions are made horrifyingly clear. A slow burn ride, but if you'd enjoy watching a tense thriller that follows an unambiguous villain, this one's for you.

Oldboy (The Original)

Look, if I even have to tell you about this movie, then you should know that you need to go watch it. It's considered one of the best noir films of all time for good reason. All I'll tell you here is that if you haven't seen it, it's not for the faint of heart, and the end may leave a bitter taste in your mouth, but the journey that our main character goes on is...truly something. Much like 'The Northman', this movie shows what obsessively seeking revenge can do to everyone involved. A harrowing, thrilling noir film, that is almost solely responsible for igniting my interest in foreign pictures.